What More Can I Say?

...Prime Minister back to finish my Business up...

Yeah, so I told you I'd be back like I left somethin'!!!

EARLY!

Ok, now back to the rest of the scheduled program, Le album Rouge...

The Red Album.

So chick number one, Distina, seems so dope, but acts so much like a dope that it doesn't seem worth the trouble...but for prospect number two, it gets even more complicated.

Again, to protect her identity, her name will be changed...lets call her, Flephony. Flephony is like sex in a can...cool to the mouth, refreshing, and very satisfying. She's also filling; has substance, character...would make me naked waffles...did I say NAKED waffles? She is fashionable, trendy, attractive, smart, fun, interesting. So what's the problem? She lives in North Carolina...I don't. I want her to come to Chicago to see what it would be like to be together for a prolonged period, but it keeps being delayed...plus we don't really have a "relationship". She knows I go out, she knows I have sex...as do I know her dealings. Which is good in a way, we are honest with one another, but it's kinda hard to see what can materialize that way. More frustrating than anything, but since it's low-pressure, there is no reason I can't keep this up while I'm dealing with anyone else...

And to anyone else, she was what I'd like to refer to as the Prototype;

and it was before the song even came out...

Let us call this lady, Beloni. Beloni was the first; not THE first, but the first chick I was really, REALLY into. Beloni also did me super bogus when we were younger. Like, "I don't want to deal with this entire genre of chick" bogus. But hey, that was around 10 years ago...things change right? They do; all of the amazing stuff about her is still there: beauty, witt, charm, clever, stylish...and her look is impressive...but I think she figured out all that made her awesome, so now she comes off a little arrogant; high society. That sucks. I mean, she isn't that way toward me, but you can see from the tip of her nose when she is looking down on others. She seems like she would become a bitter chick after 40 when she finds she's still alone...

...then there is everyone else:

No matter the color, age or location...I turn down chicks for the same three reasons, btw these reasons aren't the same as the ones I've found in the chicks described above, but they are the most common...

All women I have made walk the plank want one of three things:

1. Sex.

-Now I'm not saying that I'm superman, and I'm not saying that I superman on that ho, but I do put out an aura of awesomeness that some chicks can resist. I'm not lying, and I can't describe it. I'll just say this, I put it out there, and based on the woman's response, I know if she is full of $hit or if she just wants to bone.

2. Money.

-This one can be a little sneaky. Usually, she will make it beyond the first test, but she comes crashing down by the end of date one. Now, I'm not cheap...but my first date is never impressive, and I do it that way on purpose. I don't have to spend more than $30 to figure out whether you suck as a woman or not...and I don't mean suck in a good way. So depending on the chick, this will turn her off completely, and she will have major attitude for no apparent reason. Or if she is smart, and realizes that I am trying to get to know her, she'll hold off...until she "needs" something. I remember this one chick, let's call her Queen...her name was equally bogus, believe me. It was winter time, she is from Chicago...but she needs a winter coat. I'm like, "I'll take you to the store and help you pick one out." Nah, she wanted me to buy her one; I told her to call her pops...then her phone "stopped" working because she dropped it in the pedicure water. Please!! So I told her, "I guess I won't be hearing from you for a while." Then, miraculously, her phone started working again! I told her she should pick one of these up to help her in her efforts of money making:

I mean, green and gold works for Bishop Don Magic Juan, right?

Last but not least...

3. Overhaulin'

-They want me to fix their entire life...literally. I mean, I'm all for the fixer-upper...but I can't do a full restore. My name isn't Jesus, and I don't have the time or energy to devote to someone for that...and then they may or may not stay with me. I'm straight on that...they need to borrow Queen's prayer cloth.

Until Next Time;

Be Safe or Be Smitten!

Can I Live???

I know that I talk about the same thing all the time, but according to "Urban entertainment", all black people have the same problems: money, drugs, and relationships...my problems tend to focus on the first and the last in the list...and I'm going to focus this post on the last...

I don't understand women. Now don't get me wrong, I understand them in the traditional sense...I even understand their struggles...but what they want, and what they SAY they want are really two different things; and that is what I'm having a problem comprehending.

I won't tell anyone's names, but even if I did, they don't read this thing anyway...so I'm gonna have some fun with this.

Girl number one, (in no particular order), let's call her Distina. Distina is a really dope chick. What I mean by dope is, she's attractive enough to be considered "cute"...which is good enough. She's smart, has goals, wants something from life besides a man and some babies. Self-sufficient. A giver. She cooks, she cleans, she has decent style. She reads books...overall, a dope chick. She does stuff and has qualities that aren't too common any more these days...and she told me that she was interested in me...so where's the problem, right? Well, according to her, I dragged out my former relationship too long...which I agree with, but considering her past relationship, she has nothing to stand on giving me that judgement...and then she tells me because of that, she isn't in "that place" anymore. WTF does that mean? Not in that place? I really don't know how to take that. So does that mean that you don't like men anymore? You feel that you don't have time for a real relationship? You don't know if you have time to learn how to have a relationship with me? She can't specify...she just tells me that it isn't personal, and that I'm awesome, but she can't date me...but she doesn't know if she will be ready any time in the near future...WTF does that mean exactly? She doesn't know...but if she doesn't know, who does? But this is the thing; the guy she was with for like, five years??? Awful person, I don't even consider him a man, and she STAYED with him, trying to work it out...I don't even have the energy to devote to the dumb @$$ $hit she stayed through with him, but I don't get a shot? Come on...at least she could tell me she is healing...but she said that wasn't the issue either. So, I have come to the conclusion that I DGAF...please try to put that together, because I don't want this page to get blocked at my job like crackspace is...but every time I decide that I don't care, she tries to push herself back into contention...this will be continued tomorrow!!!

More Kicks than Karate

I know I introduced this idea like a blog or so ago, but I am indeed a sneakerhead. I don't take that title to the full degree, I don't spend my rent money on kicks, but i have been known to overspend on shoes...like I remember one time I went out to pick up one pair that I pre-paid for...that day I left with nine pair. I bought eight pairs that I didn't plan on buying. That's bad, isn't it? But is this bad?


I have tons of shoes, and I have at least two pictures of every shoe I have, and that doesn't include group shots. So overall, I probably have at least 180 pictures of my own personal sneakers. Why would I need these? Inventory for one...for two, comparing my collection with others. The sneakerworld is very competetive. I've been to the DunkXchange twice, both times it's been to Chicago, and I wanted to see what other people were getting and wearing so I could see what I should be buying.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I don't buy shoes to make others happy, but I do want to impress my peers by my level of exclusiveness and the "OMG where did you find THAT!" factor. That is one of the main driving forces behind a sneakerhead...making other sneakerheads jealous. But the jealousy is always positive; it isn't a hating group. It's more like, "OOhhhh, damn! Aren't those the Internet only versions?" We just look at it, and try to take our game to the next level.

Now this guy on the left, he was on CNBC. He's from Chicago, has a MASSIVE collection...most of his shoes are worth hundreds to thousands of dollars...the shoe that the kid is holding? 2 grand easy. He flies to different cities just to buy shoes. It is a super lifestyle choice for him. He even has a barbershop that is dedicated to kicks.

Should I be taking pictures of my shoes like they are kids? I mean, I really love sneakers, and I love the attention they draw; but dude, I've got tons of pictures devoted to kicks...but I have never taken a picture of my parents! Is that nuts? I love my parents, but I remember what they look like...and I'm not gonna go to my boy and say, "Man, my '63 Dad is way better than your '67 Dad..." I mean, as a culture, how can we compare collections without doing events and taking pictures? I'm not trying to justify it, i'm just wondering if this is weird to anyone...

...just let me know.

Be Safe or be Smitten,

Chris

Sometimes I feel like a...

Whore.

The real reason I started blogging

Well, my life isn't all kicks and giggles...so I want to share what's on my mind about myself.



Sometimes I feel inadequate. I'm not really sure why...not sure if it's because of my job not being fulfilling or not having a decent relationship with a woman of interest...I'm not sure. I know what my purpose is, but I'm not really in the position to help people at the grand scale that I'd like to. I go through this every year...and this year it's coming early. I'm sure I'll get over it...I always do; but that doesn't defer the fact that these emotions suck.

Deseptycon

I'm back again...to ask a question.

Have you ever seen someone with something fake on? Fake Prada shoes, fake Chanel bag, fake hair...well, the last one isn't so bad. The rest on the other hand...I wish I could smite those people. Now although I do have a real Coach bag, it's an attaché' case, I don't mind the fake bags just as long as it is functional and not cheap looking...and please, no more fakes with all over emblems! Anyway, my main gripe is about fake sneakers. The whole point of the collectible sneaker culture is to rock shoes that impress your peers, along with yourself of course. But when the Deseptycons come out with their fake $35 dollar-I-got-these-at-the-gas-station kicks on, it makes a real sneakerhead look bad, and get pissed off.



Here is an example of a Legit Kick:










Here is a picture of some fake-@$$ shoes:











Now the differences may be subtle to some, but to most, this is a blatant rip-off. So to all of you who by your shoes on the side of the highway on Maxwell street with a polish, or if you get them with $10 on 5 at Citgo, you need to dive head first into that pit in Sparta from the movie 300. If you can't find it, the local Spartans will direct you:




So to help you future foogazy shoe purchasers, if you have any questions about the legit factor in something, ask yourself these questions...
Does it look like it came from a store?
Does this person look smart enough to steal this much stuff from a truck/store?
Does this look like it was made by a 3 year old Turkish slave?
Is this price of $12 dollars for some $300 Jordan’s too good to be true?
If your answers are no, no, yes, and yes...pass it up.

If you take the "deal", seek that hole from 300.

Be Safe or be Smitten!!

The World is over...and people are disgusting!

Click the link above to get the original article, otherwise, read below:

Kissing Dad just feels so right By Alley Einstein


Julie is madly in love — with her own father. Last year 32-year-old Julie Symonds* received an email from her mother, who had left her in care since she was six. Trying to make up for the years of neglect, her mum announced she had a surprise — she suspected she knew who Julie's real father was. Julie, who was happily married, was thrilled, but little did she realize that very soon she would be sharing the same bed as the man she should have been calling Dad — and falling in love with him. After passing over some details, Julie contacted the man whom she believed was her dad, via email. He was 52-year-old dad Jeff Thomas*, a war veteran living in LA. "My mum dumped me in care from the age of six and I never had a father-figure. Finding out I might actually have a family was thrilling for both myself and my husband," says Julie. Jeff and Julie were stunned at how alike their writing style was in emails, even down to using the same punctuation style and wording. "It was like finding a twin or soul mate," says Jeff. The pair then exchanged photos, and were shocked at the resemblance. In March, Julie and her husband flew to Los Angeles. Julie admits to feeling instantly attracted to her father. "I saw my dad, but I also saw a sexy, attractive man. Imagine my feelings of horror and excitement, especially as my husband was with me," says Julie. Jeff, too, admits to having feelings for Julie immediately. "I recognized my role as Julie's dad, but I already found myself falling in love with her," says Jeff. "I actually thought 'Well, maybe that's the process" because we kind of fall in love with our kids when they're born. I thought that maybe I was just going through this same thing, only she's an adult, and it's perfectly normal, and I kept telling myself that." Julie and her husband stayed in a hotel and met all of Jeff's extended family. A DNA test proved that Jeff and Julie were father and daughter, but with every passing day their mutual attraction — known as Genetic Sexual Attraction — was growing. Research has shown that 50 per cent of brothers and sisters or children and parents separated at birth, who find each other as adults, experience some form of sexual attraction. While Julie's husband flew home for work, Julie moved in with her dad and his then wife to get to know the family she never knew existed. A few days into the stay there was a chance for Julie and Jeff to be alone. Sitting on the couch, Julie finally came clean about her feelings. "I admitted how I was feeling, and Jeff said he loved me too. We just sat, holding hands," says Julie, who began seeing a therapist after her first meeting with Jeff. The pair kissed, and both claim the kiss and passion felt scarily right. The relationship progressed. Jeff's marriage fell apart, and under the guise of bonding with her new family, Julie stayed with Jeff, sharing a two-bedroom flat with the man she still calls Dad. Today Julie is still living with Jeff. Her husband believes she is spending time getting to know her father and doesn't know that the pair are sharing a bed. "We have done everything but had actual sexual intercourse. It's like we're an old married couple — we're in love and know that actually having intercourse cannot be far away," confesses Jeff. The father and daughter also take trips away where they can act as boyfriend and girlfriend and relish every moment away from prying eyes. "We love each other as a father and daughter, but the problem is that we love each other more as lovers. If we weren't related she'd get divorced and I'd be getting married to her," says Jeff. Despite the criminal and ethical implications, Julie and Jeff are determined to keep seeing each other. "My father has recently retired, and he's going to move near me and my husband, where we will continue our relationship," says Julie. "My husband and I have always tried to be honest with each other and we've even promised each other that if we fell in love with another person, that we would admit it. But I'm afraid that it would be too much of a judgmental issue for him. I'm afraid that I'll become a social outcast in all of the places that I go." And yes, if someone discovers their identity and secret, they have answers prepared. "I guess the way that I see it is what goes on behind closed doors is no one else's business but my own — after all it is not as though I raised Julie," says Jeff. "I don't know. If someone were to confront me on the street I am a little bit hard-headed and stubborn so I would probably come back at them with a smart-arsed remark using what intellect I have," says Julie.



What is wrong with people nowadays? Who would really want to sleep with one of their parents? That is disgusting!!! If that isn't an Oedipus complex, I'm not sure what is...

...if you don't know who Oedipus is, check the link below:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oedipus_the_King

As always, Be Safe!!

Neverending Snowery

Corny Title...unless you watched the movies, which makes it worse.

Well, it's snowing; and because this is Chicagoland, that is no surprise. My problem is, why am I the only one not shocked? Hasn't it snowed every year since the big McCormick strike of 1886? Thought so. But, if you watch the news, you'd think it was a true to fiction "Day after Tomorrow". Over exaggeration...ughhhh. Also, you'd think that people have figured out how to drive on the snow. My dad told me, "Go to a big, empty parking lot, force your car into a spin so you can be comfortable with how it handles." Has no one else tried this? Come on...I don't get it.

As for the rest of my life, I'm still sick. Physically. I've had the worst cold/flu I've ever had. It won't go away...hopefully it will, it's affecting my charisma...stuffed sinuses aren't sexy.

Too Long, too much to say...

Well, to say the least, lots of happenings since my last post. Let's try to have a recap:

-I've lost a bunch of friends to stupidity. I like to think of this as boiling down my friends to a nice concentrated form.

-I've got a different apartment. Again, smaller can be better, right? Less space, but less rent too!

-No girlfriend, of course. I have tried it all, young, old, white, black, Asian, Spanish, Indian...and those were just the restaurants! No, really, I've tried many types, none worked so far, but they all had very, VERY different problems. I've even tried to see what happened in each case; all different scenarios...

-Steady Job, for once. I only have one job, it isn't bad, decent hours, lots of overtime offered. Good benefits...even a 401k...

-I have an obscene sneaker collection now...over 70 pair, and it's only been a year of buying...still don't have all the ones I wanted to catch up on yet. And there is a whole culture and world with it, so I don't feel too bad...

-I'm big into painting now...been doing t-shirts, hoodies, and polos...only for me though. None for sale. I'm just greedy like that. I mean, I would sell one to someone, but what price do I put on a 1 of 1 by yours truly? Besides, everyone wants one, no one wants to pay.

-I'm supposed to write a book this year. I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to get that done though. It seems so hard. I mean, I have a lot to say, but I don't really know how good it'd be, or how much help it could really offer someone else. I'm good with gems of knowledge, but for a whole chain of wisdom, I'm not sure about that.

-I just got over Typhoid fever...ok, not really, but I was mad sick...on my birthday. That sucked major testicles...like Brontosaurus testicles...huge. And I STILL didn't do anything hot for my B-Day...but I really couldn't...I sounded like I had posies in my pocket...and I wasn't casket clean yet...


...well, that's it for now, back to my 12 hour grind.

Be Safe All,

Chris

P.S. This is for you Jirzygurl!