Little introduction of this space...Hope you like it.
This is just a way of me airing out my mind in a constructive manner...the more you hold things in, the more it tears you down...let it out. Even the bad things. It'll help you understand yourself so you can change your bad habits into good practices...try it; I promise it won't kill you. Unless you are in the mob.
-Enjoy!
...is a song by Mos Def on second CD, The New Danger...the link is in the title if you are interested.
I was listening to the song today accidentally, well, not really...my iPod was on shuffle...but anyway, it's just how I felt yesterday after the resolve swept itself over my face...the sound of the music, the drums...the emotion in his voice...makes you feel like whomever he is doing this song for can't hear it...and that's how I felt yesterday; and it's how I feel today.
I wish I had something cool to talk about today, but besides watching the first season of Dexter, not much is going on with me.
Well, here is something:
I was talking with one of my friends the other day, and they were telling me about this chick that got fired because management didn't like her hair. They didn't like this chick's hair because it was "too curly". Outraged, right? That's so racist, right???
She is white.
Not even Jewish white, but like, I have family from all of the important European countries white...my grandma went to school with Mother Hubbard white...
I was so amazed at the fact that someone white, a white woman at that, was fired because of her hair...I honestly couldn't stop laughing for 9.46 minutes...it was hilarious...
Confusion always bring about conflict...and so do assumptions. Usually though, they can get hammered out, and the resolution can be beautiful...like a diamond. I mean, maybe it's cheesy, but conflict without resolution is really just pointless. If both parties don't walk away with understanding, then what was the point?
I said that to say this:
If something happens in life that you don't understand; please don't assume, ask.
So after being on hold for 36 minutes...someone finally picked up the phone. She put me on hold four times...four times. Each time was for five minutes. One of the times she was asking me for my address...you know this chick had the nerve to put me on hold for five minutes after giving my street address...and then comes back with, "...and what did you say was your city and state?"
Right...I never said my city or state yet.
And as helpful as the internet is, don't you think they would let people update their addresses online? Oh no...that's too logical. They didn't let me do that, I had to spend 57 minutes on the phone with a retarded broad that doesn't know how to breathe and see at the same time...ughhhh!!!
Well, before I start...I just want to say that there are far worse reasons to hat the IRS...but I never got my stimulus check. I mean, I think they mailed it to the wrong address honestly, and the post office doesn't forward stuff like this. SO...I'm sitting here trying to call them, and I SWEAR I've called them for a straight 30 minutes, and they are not letting the call go through...they just say, "Oh, it's too busy, call later." I don't really have a later. Anyway, I FINALLY get through...and now I'm waiting...just waiting. I called this morning, and I swear I was on the phone for like 16 minutes...no one. No one at all. I'm gonna sit on hold and take a nap...hopefully I'll hear the person when they answer. IF they answer before my lunch break is over.
I'm feeling really out of it today. It's kinda usual; only because I had grown accustomed to having a "date night" on Fridays...and now it's just me. I mean, if Liz was here, I could still have that; but I mean, it's kinda impossible to have that every week for a while...I'll have to get use to it...
...then my manager called me in for a meeting today with HR to tell me this:
"You are an awesome employee, are numbers are better than they've been all year...but we still aren't making you a full employee yet."
There is no good way to take that. I mean, I know about having faith and whatnot...but still...ANOTHER THREE MONTHS? Come on...
I really didn't even want to post today, but I wanted to put something on the page. I guess I'll go to the mall afterwork and try to find a suitcase...that'll get my mind off of it I suppose. Oh, and I STILL didn't get my stimulus check yet; but now I can call to have them resend it. I tried to call early, but I had to wait until today...and today the line is too busy for them to talk to me...perfect right? Yeah, I know.
Weight: no clue? scales are the devil therefore i stay away from them!
Occupation: Sales
Okay, enough about you. What do you LOVE about me?: Smart, Funny, Quirky, Shoe-obsessed, eclectic, diverse, and you get me...
One thing I do that drives you crazy: assuming the worse
One thing I do that you think is cute: hold my hand in the car while you are driving
Weirdest thing I do: run outside to your car at night with no clothes on.. ha!
Do I have a hidden talent?: you can find anything on the Internet.... like ANYTHING. and your sjp's of course
What was our first date?: TECHNICALLY it was to Famous Daves ! HA!
What was our SECOND date???: I guess TECHNICALLY it would have been mall/movies
What would you like to name our potential, maybe, if you act right, kids?: well i have no idea but girls middle name would have to be Elisabeth and i think a boy maybe Memphis! LOL! j/k probably James c. (I'm corny like that)
What’s one thing that someone could only know if they lived with me?: you can't breathe
What would you change about me?: your tendency to assume the worst
Favorite Artist that you wouldn't want to tell anyone about: Billy Idol! LOL! He's not my favorite, but I wouldn't tell anyone that I like him!
What CD is on your iPod that you are ashamed to have: Phil Collins... no no no scratch that... David Bowie.
If you are wondering what my answers were, they are on her blog...the site is in the Title and on my blogroll...
I mean there are HUNDREDS more...literally. But they were talking about it on the radio when I was getting dressed this morning. It's annoying. White people kept calling in like, "Well, if they call themselves that, why can't I?" I mean, logically I guess she's right, but to avoid conflict, why can't they just stop harping on our use for it? I mean, really, the only people that argue the point are the racist @$$ caucasians that use the word daily in a way to demean blacks in their everyday conversations. That's the problem; black people are a joke to them. We aren't taken seriously, and if we are, it's because they feel that we are a problem. I don't get it. I don't get it for real...it's just annoying and it needs to stop. Even if we stop saying it, they will continue to use it because they don't care; that's why they are racist. Once white america understands that, we can finally have peace with the situation.
So I've been loading new stuff on my iPod...movies, shows, songs, pictures...and now it keeps freezing. It has something to do with the type of files and the compression rates...so I found this online this morning...
Pass this along to iPod users...I'm SO excited about this...my iPod froze again last night, and I just found this:
hey, just found this out... works great for resetting/restarting your ipod if/when it's frozen--
1) toggle the hold switch on and off once... 2) hold "Menu" and "Select" for 6-10 seconds... 3) My iPod restarted and everything was still there.. **the website says to hold down the play/pause and select button...but, in a coffee induced state, I held the Menu and Select--It's great.**
I really missed my John Legend - Solo Sessions Vol. 1 Live at the Knitting Factory...
I missed my Pharaoh Monch - Internal Affairs...
I missed my Will.I.Am - Songs about Girls...
...those CDs are SO dope. I relistened to them after I put them on my iPod...music is interesting. The Pharaoh CD really reminded me of high school...I don't really miss them, but there was some really dope moments that happened in high school that I miss...but I'm not going to relive them right now; it's just interesting the things that come up when you listen to music.
I put the CD that Liz made me on my iPod too...and it was super dope; it really sounded like the overture for her Love Opera...I really appreciated it, more than she knows.
Other than that, things are pretty slow in my world. Just YouTube, Facebook applications(i.e. games), and this weekend I'm going shopping for a suitcase...exciting, right?
Dude, I love that clip from Coming to America with Sexual Chocolate...it's still funny every time I watch it.
So I was watching some Eddie Murphy clips on YouTube, and I found this:
I would post the clip, but I actually want to do a real post.
I don't know what to say anymore; in the car this morning I had an awesome topic that was interesting and fun-filled...then me taking calls by myself for two hours while my co-workers went to a meeting...it melted from my mind. I even had a slight headache because of it. I dunno. I want to go see Batman, and I thought about going tonight, but it doesn't start for another hour and a half...and it's two and a half hours long...that's nine o'clock before I start on my way home...no thanks. We'll see what happens...
I kinda accidentally found this. I know I posted about this when I went, but for those that didn't I found videos that people took at various shows on the tour:
Enjoy!
Heard’em Say
Spaceship
Overview
Longer Overview
Overview Three in Chicago on 5/24
Do you remember the wack dancing by Kanye I told y'all about?
I just listened to "The Commercial" by Lupe on Fake Shore Drive...it was a good listen...but it made me think of something...why do people in the "urban community" aka black people live to be fly? Why do we have to have the "best" of everything and struggle for our necessities? I mean, I know that goes hand in hand with being ignorant...but so many do this. If it were a plague we'd all be dead; I know I've done that at least once or twice...and I know plenty who have done the same. I mean, is it something deep or are we just stupid?
I'm starting to think it has something to do with showing other types of people...the "non minority" that we are successful. That we have something we don't...but they are the ones that put it out into the world, ridding us of our cash...which keeps us in the category of the "have nots"...
...so as a people, it's a decision that we have to make:
Should we live for the now, knowing that tomorrow is not promised or should we stack to the future, because nothing is guaranteed? That question in itself defies itself because if we save for tomorrow knowing that tomorrow is not promised, doesn't that make us foolish?
Can anyone answer this question? Am I the only one wondering which is the best? I mean, within reason of course.
On a completely different note....Check out this video of Kenna live w/Pharrell on the drums and Chad Hugo on the keys...dopeness!
I have to let you know right now...this is not an attack; I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT AN ATTACK...
...but what happen to people talking about something in Hip-Hop/Rap? Or even urban music in general? I look at my Ipod, and I notice that I have the same artists over and over...because the genres as a whole are filled with people who have a love for money, not for the art. There aren't many true musicians, true songwriters, true dreamers out there...I mean, you have your Kanye, Pharrell, Timbaland, Lupe and what not...but I mean, again, I'm not attacking...but as clever as Wayne is...he really isn't saying anything...listen; I mean REALLY REALLY listen. Yeah, he has talent, but what is he saying? Nothing.
So maybe you want to come at me because I like the Clipse, right? They talk about cocaine...because they either have, or are currently selling...cocaine. Their gma sold coke...it was a family thing. So they rap what they know. The Cool Kids...as arrogant as they are, they rap what they know; Lupe...raps what he knows. Kanye...raps what he knows. What is it that Wayne is rapping about? He's been rich since he was 14. So maybe he had it hard up to...12, then he started kicking it with the "major players" in the N.O. They got him into rapping...I mean, his first real experience with a gun he shot himself. Is that hood? Is that gangsta?
Like I said, I'm not hating, but listen, then think...I mean, Lupe can rap all punchlines...Clipse has some of the best punchlines I've ever heard...there are cats walking around Chicago right now that can't spit punchline rap until they pass out...but Wayne is the greatest alive? Come on. Jay-Z on the "I know" track kills that chance by itself; rapping from the vantage point of heroin? I mean, Lupe spit from the viewpoint of a cheeseburger...that isn't hot?
I dunno...maybe it's partially the fans fault. I mean, you have artists out there like Kenna and Pharrell's group N.E.R.D. which is where our music should be heading...but no one is accepting it the way it should be accepted. That isn't selling 900,000 copies in one week...little kids aren't singing "Say Goodbye to Love" they are buying Soulja Boy ringtones...I don't get it.
Maybe I'm harsh; my grandpa is a musician, my dad is a musician, my friends are into music one way or another...so maybe I have a better understanding on how hard it is to do a lot of things that some of these cats do...and I guess that is how I know how easy it was to make "Get Silly".
Maybe I'm old; maybe I'm a hater...I don't know...but I know one thing, I'm not claiming 90% of the bull$h^# that is out here when my kids start asking me about it. I'll play them Spaceship and Run to the Sun...I'll play them Dumb it Down and I'm Mikey...I'll play them Keys Open Doors and Out of Control...
Hell, I'll let them listen to Sara Bareilles or Feist...Panic at the Disco. That's what I'll play...or Kidz in the Hall...or anything but Lil' Boosey; isn't he like 50?
I just wanna go home. The biggest problem with that is...my home is empty. I have stuff...just no one is there but me.
I don't have a problem with me, I just don't like being alone. I am an only child. My mom worked days, my dad worked nights, but when I was home, he was sleep...I appreciated the fact that he was there...but I've had to be by myself my whole life...for the most part. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of going to bed alone, I'm tired of waking up alone, I'm tired of coming home to an empty house...does that make me selfish? Does that make me wrong? I hope not...I surely hope not.
This video is dope...Bentley's part isn't the best, but Andre' 3000 makes up for him. I'm still not sure why Kanye is in the video, but it's still dope nonetheless.
You so anti-don't not matter... You so You so You so anti-don't not matter...
I LOVE N.E.R.D.! They always have a way of cheering me up. Anti-Matter is the business!
So yeah, I'm starting to feel like some people don't matter; and to a certain point, I'm right. I mean, think about it...how many people that you come across actually matter in your personal life? Not many, right? So that should mean that whatever they say or do shouldn't bother or affect you right? Yeah, I'm still working on that too. I'm not sure if it's the fact that I feel offended by their personal stupidity, or if I feel like they are wasting my time; I'm not sure. I know it sucks though...
...so what I'm trying to do is pretend that these people aren't real, then I can have an even tone. I've never really been good at hiding my emotions...so this is not going to be the easiest thing...but I'll give it the old college try.
Well, actually, I'll give it the old XBox try; I quit college.
I'll leave you with some more Pharrell...
I know you're alive, And there's a lamp to lit inside, It's not just burning bright. It won't blow up in your face if you try, I know you try hard, but you gotta try harder. Now you got your light, you can find your way. You're a multi-tasker, you're doing things faster, Are you going to let this God-given gift decay? Wait...
So...my manager here at my newish job has pretty much given me his word on me being offered benefits soon...but now there may be a hitch. My temp agency wants a sign on bonus of $10,000! WTF!?! I mean, I just found out that they are getting 42k for me to work here...which i'm not going to get when I get switched over, but they won't wave their fee until I'm here for 6 months...so I'd have about 3 months to go...ughhhh! So annoying, so annoying.
That's about it...nothing else too exciting. My gf ordered a hoody for me...it's here today, I'm looking forward to trying that on later today...it goes with these dunks she bought me...so that'll be exciting. I have some movies to watch...I bought Wall-E on bootleg; it looks like it's going to be good, but I couldn't watch it yesterday at my homeboy's house because there were too many distractions going on.
I spent half the day with my p's yesterday...that was fun. I really love them; I just hope they know it too.
STILL waiting on my stimulus check...I think they forgot when they originally said they were mailing it.
That's all for now; if something starts to bug me later, trust me, I'll repost.
1. I've come to realize that my legs.... are stronger than I remember.
2. I've come to realize that this weekend... is going to be all types of wack.
3. I've come to realize that when I'm driving... I still don't like driving without music.
4. I've come to realize that i need... to be patient and stack paper.
5. I've come to realize that I have lost... patience for people with massive amounts of retardation.
6. I've come to realize that I hate it when... people assume they know something before you explain it.
7. I've come to realize that if I'm drunk... I'm me to the extreme.
8. I've come to realize that money... is something that I'll always want more of.
9. I've come to realize that certain people... are born to take up space, suck up air, and f-up my life.
10. I've come to realize that I'll always be.. an overanalyzer, an asshole, loyal, and loving.
11. I've come to realize that I have a crush on... so many chicks that it is ridiculous...but I'm only in love with one!
12. I've come to realize that my mom... knows more than I'll ever give her credit for, only because I don't want her to stop accepting new information.
13. I've come to realize that my cell phone is.. only important for talking...that's it.
14. I've come to realize that when I wake up in the morning... I hope it's better than my last.
15. I've come to realize last night before i went to sleep... that I can only sleep well with the woman I love in my bed.
16. I've come to realize that right now I am thinking about... every way that I lack as a man, so that I can better myself.
17. I've come to realize that my dad... has so much strength, strength that I wish I had, strength that I hope to have...I realize I respect him more than I thought I did...and that I want to be the v2.0 of him.
18. I've come to realize that when I get on MySpace... that it really is a waste of time.
19. I've come to realize that I really want... to use all of my artistic talents to make a profit.
20. I've come to realize that if I died today... I haven't done enough to help the world; but I've done more than most.
I had to do this...the new song for Converse, (which has been owned by Nike for a few years now, for all the slackers...), has a video featuring Pharrell...Check it out!
So finally, a real post. I think the abundance of videos means I really don't have too much to type about. I mean, I could rant, but who wants to hear that...well, I guess I'll do it anyway.
So why when you let people borrow stuff, and they keep it so long that you forgot that you loaned it to them, they act like they have a problem with giving it back? I mean, I bet he has some stuff that I totally thought I lost...I was looking for my dvd the other day, The Last Boyscout, I BET he has it. I mean, I love him, that's my homeboy...but still. The last straw was that he borrowed my ipod last night...even though he has his own...and then is like, oh, it froze. Ummmm...I use my joint EVERYDAY playing music for like, 9 hours while playing Klondike, and it still never froze. So, I dunno...maybe I'm overreacting, but that was so the straw that broke the camel's back.
I decided that my two favorite songs that you can actually watch a video for, (even though I'm not going to post it here), are Dumb it Down and Paris, Tokyo by Lupe the Killer bka Lupe Fiasco...and I Know by Jay-Z...all three videos are hot in their own way...be sure to YouTube them!
I know what you like, i am your prescription... I'm your physician, and I'm your addiction. You'll never be down, I know where your peak is... Like Nectar in a Sieve, I'll keep you leakin'.
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